There he was gazing up at his daddy, wearing his daddy’s shoes, laughing like he laughed, cocking his hand in his pocket the same way his daddy did, and walking with his flat feet pointing slightly outward – (almost duckish)…just like his daddy.
Although very different with unique personalities, like parrots, my boys unknowingly repeated what we said as if they thought of it themselves. Their response to the circumstances of life often was their impression of ours. The good, the bad and the ugly.
It’s what kids do. They mimic what they see and hear. That’s how they learn. They become Mini-Me’s.
Kind of scary, isn’t it?
We don’t always respond right. We don’t always love well. Hormones have a way of running amuck and life tends to get the best of us. What’s a mom to do when little hearts are being formed by the actions and reactions of her life?
What are some things a mom can do when she realizes she’s raising a Mini-Me? Here are 5 things that can help!
1. Don’t expect to be perfect. No mom is. We are all a work in progress. We all fail and we’re all flawed so give yourself the grace to know that a bad ‘mom’ moment doesn’t define you as a mom.
2. When you fail, fail well. That means, be quick to admit you messed up and just as quick to ask your children for forgiveness. When you blow it and repent, you teach them how to do the same. You instill in them the truth that failure is never final. You also help them learn to give others room to fail and room to grow.
3. Think before you speak and before you react. It’s a tidbit of wisdom passed down from generation to generation. The ol’ ‘think before you speak’ advice. Ask yourself… “Does what I’m getting ready to say really need to be heard?” and “How will what I’m getting ready to say affect my child?” If you give yourself time to think before you speak or react, your response will be different over half of the time.
4. Be a woman of integrity. Don’t talk badly about others…or they’ll do the same. Don’t talk bad about yourself…or they’ll talk bad about themselves. Don’t lie, cheat or steal…or they’ll become liars, cheaters or thieves. Be honest, gracious and dependable…and they will mimic your honesty, graciousness and dependability. Be kind and courteous…and they will imitate you.
5. Be a woman of faith. Trusting God in trying times and being the real deal are foundational faith builders in your children’s lives. They need to see that faith is true even when it’s tested most. They also can see phony faith a mile away. When a mom lives her faith well in front of her children they validate their children’s childlike faith. Be women of the Word and women of prayer. Pray for your children, with your children and in front of your children.
It’s pretty scary to know that little eyes are watching us and little hearts are being molded by the actions and reactions of our lives. But that’s why it’s so important to diligently guard our own lives because we know we are raising Mini-Me’s. David and Solomon are proof that what parents do in moderation, children will do in excess.
It’s a strange dichotomy…when children are growing up, they want to be like their parents. When they become teenagers, they swear they never will. When they become parents themselves, they begin acting like the parents they looked up to as a child.
It’s not easy being a mom. Life is hard and we don’t always get it right. We blow it. Yet, remembering that those little hearts long to fill their parents’ shoes…and one day they will. Let’s do everything we can to be sure the shoes we’re walking in will be ones worth filling.
Why?
Because we’re raising Mini-Me’s.
By: Stephanie Shott
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