“My kids are driving me crazy. I’ve tried everything . . . reasoning with them, yelling at them, taking away privileges, sending them to their rooms. Nothing is helping! My husband and I are exhausted and frustrated and on the verge of losing it.”
That’s a paraphrase of one mom’s cry for help on Facebook. She was so desperate that she aired her parenting problems to the world and admitted she and her husband were close to the breaking point. All their usual parenting efforts had failed, and I could tell that she felt like a failure as a parent.
I watched as the tips and suggestions flooded in on her Timeline, but most of them were about trying some form of harsh discipline that would create an adversary environment where the kids were the enemy and the parents the enforcers.
At some point in our parenting, we’ve all reached the breaking point these parents were rapidly approaching. They were looking for help right now. I’ve only found one book with parenting tips that apply to any child at any age at any time: The Bible.
Make God the Focus of Your Parenting and Your Family
Come, children, listen closely;
I’ll give you a lesson in God worship. —Ps. 34:11 The Message
- Give children age-appropriate Bibles at an early age and show them how to read and study. If they can’t read yet, read to them.
- Read to them from Christian storybooks when they are young, and give older kids Christian books to read. Discuss with them what they’re reading.
- Choose gifts with a message: Christian board games, CD’s of Christian musicians, Bible character costumes and dress up clothes.
- Take your children and grandchildren to church. Find a church they enjoy attending. Talk with them afterwards about what they learned.
- Enroll small children in AWANAS, Vacation Bible School, Children’s Bible Study Fellowship, or other youth groups where they learn Scripture and read their Bible in a way fun for kids to learn.
- Introduce older children to church youth programs or ministries like Young Life, Youth for Christ, or Teen Challenge where they will grow in their faith with kids their own age.
- Choose Christian-based sports programs where they learn good sportsmanship and don’t have games or practice on Sunday. Consider this: Is it more important for their eternal life for them to play in sports or grow in their faith? Find a sports program where they can do both.
- Teach them about Quiet Times and spending time with God each day reading their Bible and praying. Make sure you do this yourself for them to see and imitate.
- Tell family stories told for generations. Give your children a heritage to appreciate and remember.
- Look for teachable moments to apply God and his Word to their daily lives.
- Spend time with your kids and grandkids. Ask them about their dreams, ambitions, goals, friends…. What’s God doing in your life?
- Stay relevant in their world.
*Excerpt from Forsaken God?: Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten, used by permission.
Your Favorite Parenting Tips
I asked parents to tell me their best parenting tip and here is what they said—
Keep a schedule no matter what. Our kids eat, sleep, play, and bath every day at the same time. They rely on it and so do we.
When a child asks your opinion, ask him or her what they should do and guide them to the proper decision. This method teaches children how to make their own decisions and what the consequences might lead to if they use poor judgement.
Kids spell love T-I-M-E!
Stay close to God daily. Teach children in every way about God and lead by example.
Don’t worry so much about a messy house. One day you’ll have a spotless, empty house. Make memories now.
Ask God for wisdom and discernment knowing these precious kids are on loan; they are His creation. Teach your kids to have a healthy awe and reverence for God, by showing your kids you need God’s help desperately to raise them right.
Ask God to give you Scriptures to pray over your kids. Then use Scripture to discipline.
Say you’re sorry when you mess up.
God put parents in authority over children to raise good, godly, helpful, honest, hardworking, faithful kids to glorify Him. None of us are perfect parents, but God will hold us accountable for how we raise our children, so ask your heavenly Father for help. He’s just a prayer away.
What’s your favorite parenting tip?
Janet Thompson is an international speaker and an award-winning author of 18 books including Forsaken God?: Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten and Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter. She is also the founder of Woman to Woman Mentoring and About His Work Ministries. Visit Janet at: womantowomanmentoring.com.
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