In a recent meeting in a children’s church class room, I read rules displayed on the wall. “Side hugs only,” it warned. Everything else was about what’s NOT allowed: secrets, piggy backs, carrying, tickling, lap sitting. Are these things all bad? So dangerous? Can’t we be affectionate without being evil? Can’t we use loving touch? Does modern love have to be sterile to be safe? More than ever, our children look to us for lessons in love.
An era of evil is a hard time to for a child to learn what love is, and evil reigns today. It’s not the first time evil has reigned, but we can pray it will be the last. The realities of our world have forced us to set up rules and safety guidelines to protect our children and guard against evil. Our highly sexual, violent, and selfish world has distorted what is pure and good without sin. When Jesus invited children to come to Him (Matthew 19), 
it wasn’t evil or twisted in any way. It was good. Man’s sinful nature has distorted good love, creating a culture where churches have to set standards to protect against childhood abuse, inappropriate touching, and lawsuits. Lessons in love can be lost in eras of evil.
But God is love and loves us enough to snatch us out of evil and teach us to love again. Lessons in love aren’t obvious around us, so we have to be intentional with our children. We’re about to celebrate love with Valentine’s Day, but even that’s confusing. Children will exchange cards with faces like Snoopy, Ninja Turtles, Elsa, and Darth Vader! There are more versions of love available today than breakfast cereals at Wal-mart. So many options can be confusing. When it comes to love, we need to teach about the one that doesn’t change. Children look to us for lessons in love.
4 Basic Lessons in LOVE
- We are made to LOVE God most of all.
- We are made to LOVE with everything in us.
- We are made to LOVE with honest LOVE.
- We are made to LOVE what is good.
4 Lessons in LOVE for Others
- We are made to LOVE others like ourselves.
- We are made to LOVE others like brothers and sisters.
- We are made to LOVE others with honor.
- We are made to LOVE others like we want to be LOVED.
And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” (Luke 10:27)
Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. (Romans 12:9-10)
Do to others as you would have them do to you. (Luke 6:31)
A careful look past the Valentine decor at the store or the red silk in shop windows will reveal that the world sells a thin top coat labeled “love.” A family is a wonderful laboratory for learning what real love is. Help your children first learn to love at home among family, before trying to identify real love in the world. Let’s start by asking our families 8 questions in response to the 8 truths:
- Is our family focused on loving God most? (Love the Lord your God with all …)
- Is our family being loving in all parts of ourselves? (Heart, soul, strength, mind)
- Is our family being genuine and honest in the love we give? (Are we fake or sarcastic?)
- Is our family loving good things, refusing to love evil things? (Our entertainment?)
- Is our family loving each other like we love ourselves? (In and out of our family?)
- Is our family practicing brotherly/sisterly love at home first? (Then use it out of home)
- Is our family practicing respect and honor to others in our world? (Attitudes & talk?)
- Is our family showing the kind of love we want to receive? (Doing unto others?)
Like many moms before us, we mother our children in an era of evil. We can’t afford to be careless when it comes to teaching lessons in love. May our children hear us loud and clear, watching us live like we believe, “We love each other because he loved us first.” (1 John 4:19 – NLT)
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- A Child’s Heart and the Hidden Treasure of Talking Back - September 13, 2016
