Have you ever wondered what it might be like when your role as a daughter gets reversed and you become the parent to your mother? I didn’t give it much thought until I was suddenly faced with an ailing mother who needed full-time care. Most of my friends and family assumed that she would move into a nursing home facility. But, I knew God had quite a different plan for our family.
I felt the constant urging of the Holy Spirit to do the opposite of the main stream and care for my mom right in our own home. I definitely got some interesting feedback from friends and family who were incredulous to our decision. We heard remarks like, “Won’t it be a burden?” and “How will you ever travel?”. My husband and I prayed about the idea, and we read scripture that led us to this life changing decision. So, we moved forward because we believed it was right and God’s plan for our lives; we have never looked back.
Here are some scripture that helped us come to our decision:
But if a widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents, for this is pleasing in the sight of God (1 Timothy 5:4 ESV).
Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you (Exodus 20:12 ESV).
If any believing woman has relatives who are widows, let her care for them. Let the church not be burdened, so that it may care for those who are truly widows (1 Timothy 5:16 ESV).
I understand that it is NOT POSSIBLE for every family to care for their parents…that wouldn’t be fair. And some elderly parents simply choose to live in retirement communities and nursing homes which is their decision and is worthy of our respect. However, I believe that if you can care for your parent, you should.
The burden on most days slips quickly away into blessings of joy, laughter and a sense of peace. It can be challenging at times with my mom since she has dementia and other health issues. She daily forgets things and can be cranky and incessantly childlike. But more often than not, she is a joy to be around. She brings so much light and goodness into our lives, and she often shares wisdom through unexpected comments. She spends a lot of time playing games with our youngest daughter, and I often hear giggling wafting down the hall. The peace of having her at home and knowing that she is well-cared for has been such a blessing to us and to her. And giving back, to the one who gave me so much and made me the woman I am today, is priceless!
So, for all the moms out there caring for their own moms–keep up the good work. For the rest of you who may one day be faced with this difficult decision, give in-home care a second thought and see if it might work for your family. After all, in the words of Jesus, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
Would you share with us your experience of caring for a widow or an elderly parent?
Be Blessed,
Allison D
- Ch…ch…ch…CHANGES Are Coming in 2017 for TMI - December 27, 2016
- What New Thing Are You Ready to See God Do in Your Life in 2017? - December 26, 2016
- Heaviness and Newness - December 23, 2016
