Did Mother’s Day live up to your dreams this year, or did you go to bed last night feeling disappointed?
Most of us have probably been there at least a time or two.
Maybe you’re a single mom, so Mother’s Day for you has never meant sleeping in or having someone else help with the children. You love your children, of course, but Mother’s Day reminds you of what you don’t have: someone to help raise your blessings.
Or maybe you’re a mom with a broken heart. You’ve always enjoyed Mother’s Day but this year, you’re grieving the loss of a child or the loss of your own mother. You want to feel joyful again, but instead feel sad.
Or maybe you’re married, but for some reason, your husband didn’t pick up on the clues about what you really wanted this year.
Whatever the cause, your disappointment today is real.
So what can you do about it?
What to Do With Mother’s Day Disappointment:
1. Try to focus on the blessings instead of on the disappointment.
It’s so easy to fixate our minds on what we don’t have. The problem with doing this is, we neglect to see what we DO have when we focus on what we DON’T have.
If you have a husband, be thankful for that (even if he did miss the mark this year).
If you have living children, be thankful for them. Many women would give anything to have kids who don’t allow them to sleep in on Mother’s Day.
One life-changing way to do this is to list your gifts each day like Ann Voskamp talks about in her book 1000 Gifts. Listing things for which you’re thankful opens your eyes to see things that have been there all along. It helps you notice the blessings in your lie.
2. Grieve what isn’t there.
If you’ve lost a mother or a child, you need to grieve. Don’t pretend you’re not hurting. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be sad on Mother’s Day.
3. Communicate with your spouse.
If you’re married and your husband missed the mark this year, talk to him about your feelings. He’ll never know how he can improve if you don’t talk to him about it.
Do it kindly, of course, and with a respectful attitude. But talk to him.
And next year, talk to him BEFORE Mother’s Day. It would be wonderful if our husbands could know what we’d like, but they can’t. So the only way they’ll know is if we tell them.
4. Celebrate you.
If your family didn’t celebrate you yesterday, that doesn’t mean YOU can’t celebrate anyway.
You are a wonderful mother. You are hardworking, kindhearted, sacrificial, generous, the tone-setter of your home, beautiful, kind, and amazing.
Do something this week to celebrate just how great you are! Buy yourself a coffee or cupcake. Read a good book. Pick up a copy of a devotional for moms. Go to dinner with a friend. Take a nap. You deserve it.
What other tips have helped you overcome Mother’s Day disappointment?
Lindsey Bell is the author of Unbeaten and of Searching for Sanity. She’s also a stay-at-home mother of two, minister’s wife, avid reader, and chocolate lover. You can find Lindsey online at her website: www.lindseymbell.com.
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