My mother thought if she loved my father enough, he would change. He didn’t.

Instead, I watched my father love my mother to the best of his broken abilities. I watched my mother become less of a woman, and I watched my heart break into millions of little pieces as my mother would clean up the glass from one of my Dad’s anger fits or hold an ice pack to a broken nose; deep down I knew this wasn’t real love or healthy. 

Flash forward fifteen years later. I am raising two girls and one precious boy. My fifteen year old has discovered the opposite sex and is testing the waters of romance. The last thing I want her to think is that she can change someone by loving them–isn’t this the essence of 50 Shades? Ana thinks if she loves Christian enough, she can chase away his demons? Is this what we want our children to encounter in box office hits, novels or real life?

This isn’t real love. The problem with the sex and the romance portrayed in this movie or any other erotic novel, or in real relationships is that it is never honest, always selfish, extremely self-seeking, never truthful, never honorable, never trusting, and never protecting. There is no hope, no celebration, no wonder, no beauty, no commitment.

Take a Stand

To the mothers and women of America, we have this single moment in time to do something jaw dropping. We can stand together and make history.  Instead of standing in line at the box office, we can be home in bed with our husbands or on a date. Don’t underestimate the significance of this. Here, now, we have been given the opportunity to make a statement to the next generation of both women and men–to NOT see this movie. Instead set the example of real romance.

Here, now, you have been given the opportunity open the eyes our society, our church culture, and tell Hollywood this film is garbage, while we can’t chase away abuse, the love of money, or pornography we can do this:

Don’t buy one ticket. Not one. 

Instead

Go on a date. 

Or have sex.

Or BOTH.  

 Show America and your children your morals. Show your children and husband what you truly value. And if that isn’t enough to move you take action, read Matt Walsh’s post here. 

While other women are standing in line, I’ll either be on a date or in bed with my husband because this is the kind of love I want to celebrate. This is the kind of legacy I want to leave my kids. I want them to understand that in marriage  sex and romance is hot and passionate. I want them to know marriage is a never ending love story of discovering your partner. 

102 Date Night Ideas plus Hot Mama Tips

If you’re a single mom, I hear your heart; I want to encourage you to take your children on a date, and if you’re the mom who needs a list of ideas to create date night anytime, anywhere, here are 102 Date Night Ideas PLUS two more ideas from Erin Macpherson and Kathi Lipp. Sign up for Friday Night Lights Off to get date night tips texted to you every Friday. Join their Hot Mama Facebook Group too. 

For a printable version of this list, click here: 102 Date Night Ideas TMI

1. Netflix night—watch movies or your favorite TV series on Netflix when the kids are in bed. Plan a movie marathon night. Order take out or make the perfect movie meal.
2. Stargazing in the backyard.
3. Bubble bath with glow sticks (trust me, the glow sticks are worth it and your husband will LOVE seeing the soft glow against your skin).
4. Board games: Monopoly, Twister, etc.
5. Fondu—what can go wrong with chocolate?
6. Camping indoors—complete with sleeping bags, tent, and a string of Christmas lights along with your favorite snacks.
7. Picnic indoors.
8. Picnic at your favorite park or in the backyard during lunch breaks if your schedules match up.
9. Sushi night— Plan a take out night with your favorite food and eat it in bed.
10. Do crossword puzzles together.
11. Go for a walk or jog. Because of my husband’s knee issues, he either rides his bike or one of our kids’ scooters.
12. Go for a bike ride and watch the sunrise or sunset.
13. Go fishing at sunset. Pack some sandwiches and chairs.
14. Give each other back rubs or foot massages with warming gel.
15. Visit a local winery for an afternoon or evening filled with taste testing wine while snacking on cheese and other complimentary snacks.
16. Create a gourmet meal. This is one of our favorite nights. My husband can make anything taste like it came from a five star restaurant—even refried beans. Make sure to grab the candles and eat by candle light or by the fire place.
17. Homemade pretzels. Here are the recipes: Vegan Soft Bites & Soft Pretzels. 
18. Make homemade taffy. The pulling is a lot of fun. Old Time Taffy Recipe
19.  Try a new exercise together.
20. Dress up and visit open houses at homes for sale in your area. Chat about whether or not you like the back splash. 
21. Midnight nacho run. If you have older kids, this one is so much fun.
22. Have a facial night. Try making homemade facials. Believe it or not, some guys go for this, especially if it means he might see you naked. Facial Recipes
23. Weekend alone in your home. Drop the kids off for an overnight at their friends’ homes or at grandmas.
24. Morning or evening devotions together.
25. Be a tourist in your own city. Look for travel guides and visit local attractions. Remember to take pictures.
26. Facebook romance. Often when I’m at work, Chris will send the lines of songs to romance me in private messages. You can also Facebook each other at home.
27. Youtube dancing. Learn your favorite dance at home. (Lift from the movie Dirty Dancing). 
28. Play video games.
29. Card games with stripping.
30. Take a shower together.
31. Flea market browsing. I love this one; it often sparks my husband’s carpenter skills.
32. Attend a college sports game; grab his favorite snack like popcorn or hotdogs.
33. Create a drive in night. Grab your computer and watch movies in the car with your favorite snacks and cozy blankets. (DO NOT TURN ON YOUR CAR).
34. Do activities at your local fun center: bowling, ice skating, horse shoe, or roller-skating.
35. Play games together at the arcade.
36. Go to the gym together. Many gyms have passes for trying the gym for the first time.
37. Go rock climbing or try a new exercise together. Make it a challenge and whoever loses has to give a back rub.
38. Try a new exercise DVD together at home.
39. Dress up and visit open houses at homes for sale in your area.
40. Play Frisbee golf at the park.
41. Play Frisbee golf in the backyard with laundry baskets after the kids are in bed.
42. Do a home improvement project together.
43. Make organizational projects to help with the clutter at home. DIY Pinterest Project. 
44. Visit the local hardware store for ideas to remodel. You’ll get ideas for a new backsplash for the kitchen sink.
45. Visit a furniture store, and don’t forget to try the beds.
46. Bake and decorate cookies together.
47. Draw artsy portraits of each other with or without clothes.
48. Take photos of each other for each other’s work desks.
49. Create a memory book of your favorite dates for each of your kids. Include 10 building blocks you use for a good marriage.
50. Wrap gifts while you watch your favorite holiday movie.
51. Dessert night. Visit your favorite restaurant for dessert. Be sure to check the site for coupons.
52. Dress up and order appetizers at a high end restaurant.
53. Visit your local museums. Many are free or have times when you can visit for free.
54. Attend a local concert in the park. Grab a blanket, chocolates and other snacks. Check your city’s community events.
55. Go sledding without the kids and bring a mug of hot cocoa and share kisses in the car.
56. Spend an afternoon picking fruit or vegetables at a local farm.
57. Spend an evening planning a getaway trip and create a savings jar. Savings JAR DIY
58. Take your guy to the gun range and learn how to shoot. Sounds like a strange date but it is a lot of fun.
59. Plan a book review night. Read books like Love to Stay orLove and Respect.
60. Hobby night. Your hobby may be knitting and his may be rocking the guitar, try teaching each other.
61. Hang out at the local library on a Saturday morning reading the newspapers or browsing for new books.
62. Travel back in time. If you live close to where each other grew up, visit your childhood homes and neighborhoods. Grab a camera and take pictures there of your grown up selves.
63. Eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner in bed; lock the kids out until you’re finished with the meal.
64. Roast marshmallows and make s’mores over your backyard fire pit or your kitchen stove.
65. Play hide and seek with post it notes. Plan ahead to leave clues all over the house where your hubby can find you. Consider spicing it up by wearing one of his t-shirts or a new night gown (make SURE the kids are asleep.)
66. Learn a new card game together for two. Card Games for Two. 
67. Catch fire flies. Seriously! It is a lot of fun.
68. Go horseback riding. Often you can find horse ranches outside city limits. Google to find one in your area.
69. Pick out flowers or vegetables to plant.
70. Go to a drive-in theater together. Make or purchase your favorite snacks (let him pick the movie).
71. Run through the sprinklers or hang out in the kiddie pool—without the kids.
72. Circle Maker night. If you’ve read the Circle Maker, you and your spouse can write out goals and prayers for each other, for each child, and as a family.
73. Visit your local bookstore and browse CD’s and books or people watch—our favorite.
74. Walk to your local coffee shop and share a scone and a coffee.
75. Go to open mic night at your local coffee shop.
76. Go to the carnival and state fair. Embrace the cheesiness and purchase cotton candy to eat while cuddling on the Ferris wheel.
77. Visit your local car dealer and let him test drive his dream car.
78. Visit a chocolate or cookie factory or ice cream shop. If they offer tours, plan to go on one.
79. Prep meals together. Google your area to see if there is a business where you can prep freeze ahead meals or pick a couple of recipes to do at home.
80. Invite another couple over for dinner.
81. Visit the zoo and take a slow walk, taking in God’s creation.
82. Take a class together. Many community colleges offer community education programs. Try a cooking class or pottery class.
83. Take a CPR class and practice on each other at home.
84. Window shop downtown or at the mall. Pick out a new sexy night gown or bra.
85. Go hiking.
86. Camp overnight at your local recreational park. Either camp in your car or in a tent by the lake.
87. Save some cash and stay the night at a bed and breakfast in your area.
88. Housesit at a friend’s house together.
89. Surprise your guy with tickets to his favorite major league sport.
90. Go to a local high school or college game. Go to their website and print out the season’s schedules to put on your fridge for last minute date nights.
91. Watch a play together at the local high school or community theater.
92. Hunt garage sales. Grab his favorite on the go breakfast and hunt for home improvement items, décor, or whatever else strikes his fancy.
93. Rent a tandem bike. Pack a few sandwiches or snacks and work together to get moving.
94. Stay the night at a local hotel. Plan ahead and visit the hotel’s site for good deals.
95. Visit a planetarium. See the stars without braving the cold by getting tickets to the planetarium (for extra privacy for make out sessions, go during off seasons).
96. Volunteer at a local shelter together or another area of interest like Habitat for Humanity.
97. Go with him on a business trip or vice versa. He might be gone all day, but you’ll have a cozy hotel room to cuddle when he gets back. Order room service.
98. Sign up for a 5K or try something more challenging like the Warrior Dash www.warriordash.com. Train alone but also train together when your schedule’s allow.
99. Go to a marriage retreat. This will take some planning and saving, but it is SO worth it. Consider Family Life’s:Weekend to Remember.
100. Dance in the kitchen. Load your Ipod with your favorite tunes and dance the night away.
101. Go the dog park. If your man is a dog lover, he will love you for this one.
102. Play hooky. Send the kids to school and spend the day doing your favorite activity or stay in bed.

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Stephanie Shott

Stephanie Shott is the founder of The M.O.M. Initiative, a ministry devoted to making mentoring intentionally missional. She is an author and a popular speaker who helps women live full, fearless and faithful lives. To invite Stephanie to speak at your next event, visit her website at www.stephanieshott.com. To find out more about The M.O.M. Initiative or to begin a M.O.M. Mentor Group, visit www.themominitiative.com.

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