“I wish you would turn into a ball and roll away.”
Apparently my second oldest wasn’t too excited about my pregnancy with our fourth child.
Adding a new person into the family fold causes adjustments for all family members.
Because this was child number four, I wasn’t too worried. (I may have felt alarmed had this been my second baby.)
Our home in La Mesa, California was very…shall we say..cozy. We decided it was best to have our girls (the oldest and the third) share a room and give the new baby her own room. As we prepared for the big move, we pulled out all the infant paraphernalia: a bassinet, bouncy chair, baby swing, mobile, and car seat. The crib remained up (from child number three) and then we purchased a toddler bed for child number three.
Even though all the baby stuff was hand-me-downs (we had four kids in five years) , the infant equipment seemed new and foreign to the three older kids. They tried out the car seat, sat in the bouncy chair, handled the mobile, put their baby dolls in the bassinet and the swing.
They were getting comfortable and accustom to the baby stuff. I think part of the adjustment was getting used to that “stuff”.
Tom and I would tell each of the kids stories about what they were like as babies. They hung onto every word. We were intentional about laying the “relating to baby” ground work. This built anticipation and provided some knowledge for what life with a new baby would be like.
We did a little accident prevention by adding a hook to the exterior of the baby’s door. This would keep any unsupervised little ones out of the room, when the baby was sleeping.
It has been said our first kids survive in spite of us and subsequent children because of us. Safety with the second and beyond is definitely one of the top priorities.
When Kendra was born I wondered how my ball-rolling-away-wishing son would respond. (Maybe he was only upset with me. )
He was great. He was very interested in his newborn sister; gentle and attentive. When she was in the swing he would sit next to it and “read” books to her. When she got to the solid food phase he helped feed her.
If you are getting ready to welcome home number two, or more. Don’t worry but do get ready.
Help your older one adjust to the physical items by making them available to handle, taking the mystery and taboo away from the equipment. Prepare him or her emotionally and mentally by talking about his or her baby stories.
And… when that new little bundle arrives, be sure to spend some sweet time alone time with that older sibling.
We thought about a fifth child. But we liked the even numbers and decided six would be too many.
So… we got two dogs instead.
Life with kids is good and full.
Not always easy but always good.
Every good and perfect gift is from above.
James 1:17
What have you done to help prepare your children for a new arrival?
If you liked this article you may enjoy Lori’s two newly published books based on the famous love chapter in 1 Corinthians 13. Raising Little Kids with Big Love and Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love .
by,
Lori Wildenberg
co-founder of 1 Corinthians 13 Parenting
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