“Really? I’ve never felt the need for therapy…”
Whoops. I did it again.
I confided in another mom.
One that I thought would “get it.”
When I told her of the struggles I’d had with one of my kids, and how my husband and I thought that the best thing to do was to get some professional help, I thought I was extending a little offering: I’ve struggled with my kids. If you need someone to understand, I will.
Instead, she took that offering and smooshed it under her foot like a cigarette butt she was trying to stamp out. “Really? I’ve never felt the need for therapy…”
When my kids were younger, this comment would have slayed me. Here is the inner dialogue that I would have been reciting to myself:
“Great. Now she knows that you’re a bad mom.”
“If only you were a better mom, you wouldn’t have needed other people’s help.”
“Next time, don’t tell anyone what’s going wrong!”
It’s my three frienemies: Fear, Shame and Guilt. They are showing up to say “We’re here to protect you!” but really, they are just trying to keep me isolated and alone in my mothering. They tell me that everyone else is doing it better (and by the way, their house is cleaner, too. Oh, and their kids only eat organic veggies for snacks.)
Yep – that time I reached out and got my hand slapped. But most of the time, the answer comes back with the two sweetest words in the English language: “Me too.”
“Sometimes I feel like a bad mom.” “Me too.”
“I need some help with my parenting.” “Me too.”
“I really blew it this week.” “Me too.”
And sharing our mom struggles – that is one of the biggest killers of Fear, Shame and Guilt.
Because it’s the wise mom who says “I can’t do this on my own!”
It’s the good mom who says, “I blow it. But with help, I’m growing stronger.”
It’s the growing mom who says, “Please don’t beat yourself up. Grace abounds.”
It’s the brave mom who says, “I need some help here.”
If you are a mom that deals with these same “frenemies” then Kathi invites you to take the 5 Days of Hope for Bad Mom Moments Challenge. Sign-up here to take the challenge.
Kathi has generously donated 3 signed copies of her soon-to-be released book, I Need Some Help Here! Hope for When Your Kids Don’t Go According to Plan.
Just comment below about a time another mom said “Me too!” to you and it gave you hope or you were able to extend that hope to a fellow mom.
Winners will be announced Sunday, on Mother’s Day!
Summer is coming! Download Kathi’s eBook, Surviving Summer Vacation for FREE TODAY!
- Ch…ch…ch…CHANGES Are Coming in 2017 for TMI - December 27, 2016
- What New Thing Are You Ready to See God Do in Your Life in 2017? - December 26, 2016
- Heaviness and Newness - December 23, 2016
