Loss of a Baby

Spread the love

Dovenbarger

For the waves of death encompassed me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me; the cords of Sheol surrounded me; the snares of death confronted me. In my distress I called upon the Lord, yes, I cried to my God; and from His temple He heard my voice, and my cry for help came into His ears.  2 Samuel 22:2-7

 

Decaying oak leaves permeated the air as I sat alone hugging my knees close to my chest. A crisp, fall breeze combed through my  hair as if trying to untangle my raveled thoughts.

A year of bitter trials left its painful wake behind me as I sat and tried to make sense of it all.

 My once strong faith now resembled the surrounding bare oak trees.  Each flourishing “leaf” of faith from the past thirty years was now painfully stripped by the cold winds of trials.

I sat alone, wrestling with God and my thoughts while my husband visited the funeral home. He was finalizing the burial of our fourth child, the last trial in a painful series over the last nine months.

My mind raced. For the first time in my life I had to know.  Was heaven real? Would I really see my stillborn baby boy again?

The desire to be with my child who death stole from my arms was overwhelming. Every cell in my body longed for him. The grief was suffocating and physically painful.

Frantic desperation washed through me.  The thirst to get to my son was overpowering as I wondered if I  would ever see my son’s black hair and chubby cheeks again.  Maybe this really was the end.

And…What if he needed me? What child does not need to be with his mom? When are a mother and child ever to be so utterly separated?

Then, Jehovah-jireh, our God who foresees our needs provided me with His comfort.

A car came winding slowly up my long country driveway. Who could it be? I was not expecting anyone.

A kind lady I had never seen before or since came out of her car carrying a steaming pot of chicken soup and a book with scripture all about heaven.  She said something nice then left as quickly as she came.  

 There on my front porch God knew my doubts and fears and provided what I needed exactly when I needed it most.

“I am overcome with joy because of God’s unfailing love, for He has seen my troubles, and He cares about the anguish of my soul.” (Psalm 31:7 NLT)

Alone again with God, this time refreshed knowing God knew the anguish of my tattered soul.   

“I, even I, am he who comforts you…”  Isaiah 51:12

“As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you….” Isaiah 66:13

Christ has been raised from the dead.  He is the first of a great harvest of all who have died.

So you see, just as death came into the world through a man (Adam), now the resurrection from the dead has begun through another man (Jesus). Just as everyone dies because we all belong to Adam, everyone who belongs to Christ will be given new life…the last enemy to be destroyed is death.  

1 Corinthians 15:21-26

 

Mom, do you feel alone in your grief?  How can the M.O.M Initiative encourage you towards God’s Word to comfort your broken heart? Our desire is to walk alongside you and pray for you today.

Please come visit me!  www.taradovenbarger.com  or see more in this video.

Stephanie Shott
Latest posts by Stephanie Shott (see all)
Share