She mounted the twisted iron ladder to the monkey bars. Surely she could slip and smack her nose. So I yelled to my six-year-old before she reached the second rung. “Be careful!”
Those words fly out of my mouth about a hundred times a day.
When my daughters dance dizzy in the living room, run barefoot through the yard, fumble with poster paints, or beg to pour the milk—my mommy reflex blurts, Be careful! Accidents are not on our agenda today.
The way I see it, God entrusted these children to my care, and I am determined not to mess it up. So I teach my kids to be cautious. But do they also know how to be brave?
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline,” (2 Timothy 1:7).
If your goal is to raise a timid child, l can offer a few tips—from experience:
- Say “be careful” more than you say “I believe in you.”
- Pray for your child’s safety more than you pray for her character.
- Fear the world more than you trust God.
Terrible, isn’t it? I try so desperately to spare my kids pain, that I might actually be hindering their progress. Because beneath my anxious surface, what I really want most for them is faith—to love and follow Christ with unswerving devotion. That kind of life is meaningful beyond measure, but it may not necessarily be safe.
Sometimes, God asks us to take risks. Bold faith requires stretching beyond what’s comfortable or certain. What if God’s plan for my daughters involves traveling to faraway places? What if it involves chasing an impossible dream, discovering a cure for cancer, or jumping out of airplanes?
What if they are to become mothers themselves? Such a calling is not for the faint of heart. My girls are going to need some serious moxie.
How will they get it if I never let them taste adventure?
She looked both ways then pedaled into the street. My eyes shifted from my daughter’s training wheels to the line of cars idled at the stoplight. Those automatic words burned on my tongue—be careful!—but this time I squelched them and delivered a different message instead.
“You did it, sweetheart! You’re getting really good at riding your bike. You are so brave.”
I wish I could say the same thing about myself. Caution and timidity are comfy old pals, but I’m working on befriending my spirit of power. With God’s help, my kids will not learn fear from their mother’s example.
We’re going to find our courage together.
QUESTION: ARE YOU AN OVER PROTECTIVE MOMMA WHO MIGHT BE PREVENTING YOUR KIDS FROM BECOMING BRAVE? DO YOU TRY TO SPARE YOUR KIDS FROM PAIN OR CONSEQUENCES?
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