I could hear her calling me from upstairs. I really wanted to finish the article I was writing. I only needed 100 more words and I would be done, but my daughter continued to call for me. I saved my document and grumbled to myself as I walked up the stairs to see what she needed.
As I walked up the last step to our gameroom I could see what she wanted. My great grandmother’s little round table was set with plastic dishes and a chair was waiting for me. Gracie has invited me to join her and her dolls for high tea.
“Mommy, let’s have tea!” my 4 year old daughter proudly exclaimed.
“Gracie, I can’t right now. I need to finish my article before I have to cook dinner. Let’s do this later.”
She looked down at her dolls and said, “That’s ok, you won’t be able to come later either.”
Her words hurt deep and I knew she was right. My article wasn’t important, my daughter was. My article was urgent because I had a deadline that was quickly approaching. But at this moment, I was choosing the “urgent” over the “important”.
Sometimes as a mom it is really hard to decipher the difference between issues of importance and issues of urgency. We have so many things going at the same time and we try to do it all.
Issues of importance are on a vertical scale. They deal with your relationship with God first and then your relationship with others. They are self-sacrificing, private and often invisible. It is choosing others over yourself.
Issues of urgency are on a horizontal scale. When addressed they do not enhance a relationship with others. It is putting yourself before others even though we think we are doing it for someone else. They are often simply tasks to perform. There is a time & place for the urgent; but our world has replaced the important with the urgent. Urgent things, when done, are usually more visible to others. When I cook dinner, everyone knows it because they can smell it. When I check email, the sender knows because I respond. But when I pray for that sender, no one knows but me & the Lord. Do you see the difference? It is the things of importance that really matter. Those urgent things can wait; really they can. What is the worst thing that will happen if you read with your little boy and don’t clean up the kitchen right after dinner? You might have to scrub that pan a little harder. But the reward of spending time with you child is that you have filled up your son’s love tank by stopping the urgent and doing the important with him.
And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them. Mark 10:13-16
Jesus knew the difference. He was trying to teach the disciples the difference between what was urgent and what was important. As Jesus was teaching the crowd these children began coming to him. The disciples saw them as a distraction but Jesus knew differently. I really wish we had a follow up of one of those children who sat on Jesus lap that day. How did that moment with Jesus change their life?
I have never regretted putting aside the urgent for the important. Too often I look back and wonder why I put so much priority on what I thought was urgent. I have missed wonderful conversations with my teens because I thought I just had to get that email sent out, or missed out on baby doll tea parties because I was determined to get another article finished.
I challenge you to evaluate your day. What is on your list that you would consider urgent and what is there that is important? Usually the important things are not on the list, they are hidden within the list. Don’t miss them! Be mindful of what important things that God is placing in your day. You will be greatly blessed for choosing the important and I think you will be amazed at how you will still get many of the urgent things done also.
By Dana Bailey
*Images by Microsoft Clipart
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