Why Having “The Talk” Is Not Enough

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There is no question the culture in most developed nations is sexually charged. Sex sells everything from shampoo and deodorant to lawn mowers. According to a report by Harris Interactive in 2007 68% of TV shows have explicit sexual content. The “wardrobe malfunction” of the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show reminds us that even sporting events are not safe. In a world where our young girls are being sexualized (see Toddlers and Tiaras), is it reasonable to think that one sex talk is enough to combat what our culture throws at our kids daily?

Instead I challenge you to begin an open dialog about sex with your children at a young age. Then continue the dialog in age appropriate ways throughout their lives. Remember sex isn’t something dirty or embarrassing. Sex is wonderful when kept in the confines of marriage.

I am guessing that the vast majority of you are thinking, but… But I was never taught how to do this. But I messed up so how can I teach my kids. But I don’t even know what God says about sex. But I don’t have the tools to do this without messing up my kids. But I am embarrassed. Yes I faced lots of concerns as I began the dialog with my kids about sex. The alternative is stark though moms. According to an American Academy of Pediatrics report from 2001, teens rank media second to sex education at school as the place they get their information about sex. Media – the place where sex without consequences is preached.

There is good news though moms. There are so many wonderful resources to help you talk to your children about sex. First I encourage you to find the God’s Design for Sex series. It is a series of four books for four different age ranges. The first book The Story of Me is geared toward three through five year-olds. It is completely age appropriate and such a great way to open the discussion of where babies come from. Each book builds on the information of the previous book and discusses sex, gender, and much more from a Biblical perspective.

Next as your children are nearing puberty there is a wonderful resource for you to create a special weekend with your child. This resource is by Family Life and is called Passport 2 Purity. It is filled with fabulous information and opens the discussion of when to date and how to protect your purity. They think of everything from hands-on visuals that help your kids understand what God says about sex to special experiences for you to share with your kids.

Finally remember your children probably know more about sex than you realize. Opening this dialog will only encourage a healthy exchange of information. Your children will be comfortable asking you questions about sex instead of being left to fend for themselves. It may begin a bit uncomfortable at first, but the results are invaluable.

What resources have you found helpful when talking to your children about sex?

By Angela Mackey

Stephanie Shott
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