“Say you’re sorry, Riley.”
“Sorrrrrreeeeee.”
“She doesn’t mean it! She’s not sorry.”
A common exchange among siblings. a challenging situation for moms and dads.
Saying sorry is sometimes just saying words. Kids can spot an insincere apology a mile away.
My sister-in-law was once a member of a cult called Eckankar. The sect taught that Christians were all hypocrites; a believer could do whatever he wanted, ask for forgiveness, and then do it again later.
Hyper-grace.
Giving an insincere apology is a lot like seeking hyper-grace.
So, yes, all a Christ follower does need to do is ask for forgiveness. And yes Jesus does tell us to forgive over and over again. But …fake doesn’t fool God. He knows when repentance is missing.
Repentance is more than momentary regret. It’s a commitment to personal change and a resolve to live differently. This shows a true forgiveness seeking attitude.
Yet, changing old ways is not easy. Not easy for us. Not easy for our kids.
But it is simple.
My tongue can be really sharp. To be honest, I can control it. I only use my weapon on people (by people I mean my husband) who are safe.
I do not want to be a slave to this sin. It doesn’t glorify God or honor my husband. And… according to Romans 6: 1-14, I can be free (I hear Tom saying, Hallelujah!).
We all need help with our personal sin-slave struggle. We can be unchained. We can have a new start. We can be free!
I’ve discovered that it is important not only for me to confess my sin to the Father but also to those I have hurt. Then ask for forgiveness and verbalize my plan going forward: how to redeem the situation and how to reconcile with the one I have hurt. (side note: This is also a good model for parents to use with kids: pray, confess, ask for forgiveness, redeem, reconcile, pray)
But I cannot stop there. I also need to pray that the cutting words I want to extinguish are replaced with an attitude and a behavior that pleases God and shows love to my guy. “Lord, please replace my harsh words with words that speak life, words that are kind, words that build up and encourage.”
Habits are hard to break. But we can be more than conquerors over whatever is our sin-propensity.
Through accountability, prayer, and the Holy Spirit we can be free.
Amen and Amen.
One final thought: My sister-in-law broke free of the cult and is now on fire for Jesus! All things are possible with God!
For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.
Romans 6: 14
Today is day 3 of week 2 of the New Start ’15 4 week Bible Study. It’s not too late to join in. Here’s the link to the schedule for the next two weeks.
Click here for the New Start 15 Reading Plan
Click here for the New Start 15 Facebook page so you can interact with others.
Click here for the New Start 15 Resource List.
Lori Wildenberg
The idea of replacement prayers and how to pray them can be found in Lori’s 3rd co-authored parenting book, Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love. (for parents of tweens, teens, and young adults)
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- 9 Ways to Raise a Rebellious Kid - December 14, 2016
- 9 Ways to Create a Rebellious Heart in Your Child - November 15, 2016
- The Creepy Clown Craze and Your Child - October 20, 2016
