Last November, exactly one week before Thanksgiving, my husband and I experienced our fourth miscarriage.
That was after months of fertility testing and thinking that this time was going to be different than the previous three pregnancies.
Needless to say, I wasn’t very thankful on Thanksgiving.
All I wanted was to hold the baby that was now out of my reach.
I knew I had a lot to be thankful for, but I couldn’t seem to focus on these things. Instead of focusing on the things God had given me, I focused on what had been taken from me. On what I lost.
As I write this post and we near the one-year anniversary of our loss, I’m determined to make this Thanksgiving different.
I don’t want to miss my blessings because of my hurts. I don’t want to miss the joy because of the pain.
Have you been there?
You want to be thankful—know you have much to be thankful for—but for some reason, just don’t feel it.
Here are a few things that are helping me be thankful…even when I don’t feel it:
1. Say it.
For years I had it backward. I thought you had to feel thankful to say “thank you.” But you don’t.
The feelings of thankfulness will follow the expression of it.
When you begin to thank God for the blessings in your life (maybe even the difficulties), He enables you to feel thankful.
2. Focus on your blessings.
It’s so easy to focus your attention on what you don’t have instead of on what you do. Unfortunately, when you do this, you miss some of the blessings in your life that are right in front of you.
Hebrews 12 tells us to fix our eyes on Jesus. I think the author of this book knew that if we didn’t fix our eyes on Him, we would fix our eyes on something else—probably something negative.
3. Do something for someone else.
There’s just something about service that grows thankfulness within. As you take your eyes off of your situation and look into the eyes of those around you, your perspective shifts.
You start to realize that the secret to thanksgiving is not to have it all. The secret to thanksgiving is to be thankful for what you have.
So tell me, what are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?
By Lindsey Bell
Lindsey is the author of Searching for Sanity:52 Insights from the Parents of the Bible. She’s also a stay-at-home mother of two, minister’s wife, chocolate-lover, adoption advocate, miscarriage survivor, and avid reader. You can connect with Lindsey online through….
Lindsey Bell is the author of Unbeaten and of Searching for Sanity. She’s also a stay-at-home mother of two, minister’s wife, avid reader, and chocolate lover. You can find Lindsey online at her website: www.lindseymbell.com.
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